Taking it for Granted

This is my entry into a Reader’s Digest Contest.  The theme is Share Your Story in 150 words or less.  If you want, you can vote for it here http://apps.facebook.com/yourlifecontest/content/taking-it-granted It’s people’s chance to make a long story short for the chance to win a cash prize.  Since my husband told me I’m his only hope of fortune and fame I must take the steps in that direction, so I did.  It took me a while to figure out what I’d write, but I finally figured it out.  The issue is a very uncomfortable one, so if it offends or whatever, I’m sorry.  Go back to your normal lives and forget that you read it.  I’m warning you now this will not make you feel all warm an fuzzy inside, so if you’re looking for that today, go somewhere else.  Still with me?  *sigh* don’t say I didn’t warn you.

Normal parents take the most mundane things for granted.  Most parents do not have to worry about changing a diaper.  Most parents are more concerned about doing it right.  A new parent that was molested as a child has other worries.  Am I going to molest my child?  They know that every parent has to change their baby’s diapers, and yet they can’t shake the feeling that they’re doing something “dirty”.  The first diapers are the worst.  Bathes are even harder.  The first years can be nerve-wracking.  If you’re lucky, the feeling goes away a bit.  You realize that you would never do those things to your children.  The fear never really goes away, but as you get older, you get better at knowing it’s just fear.  Normal parents take the most mundane things for granted.

About Cici Brown
I'm a happily married mother of two and a half. I'm usually pretty bubbly and in some cases, according to my husband, too open about everything. I am and always will be a gamer geek, though I haven't table-top roleplayed for many years. I still manage to hit an MMO or two. My interests include most things geek and Vampire fiction, though not the sparkly kind, that's not vampire fiction. I have goals towards publishing that have yet to be fulfilled but one day...

2 Responses to Taking it for Granted

  1. How BRAVE of you to talk publicly about such a difficult topic and for admitting your own discomfort! It’s difficult enough to know if you’re doing the RIGHT thing with your child when your child gets in trouble for fighting or any NUMBER of grievances through the years.

    However, even when I had to wake up my 23-year-old, who was passed out drunk to take him to jail (yeah, he had weekend jail for his SECOND DUI) and many other INSANE things I’ve dealt with as a mother, none of them compares to what you went through with your newborn. SO, AGAIN, KUDOS to you, Ci Ci, for your bravery and your ability to overcome such a difficult situation! 🙂
    ~Tenaciousbitch/Kennedy Smith

    • Cici Brown says:

      NO really, compared to what I’ve been reading in your blog, you’ve got ten times more balls than I ever would! It was a lot worse when my first was brand new and I didn’t know what type of a mother I’d be. I knew what I wanted to be…He’s much grown now, and I had another who is getting older faster than I want, and that little demon has faded into a barely heard whisper. My kids have ten times the things I did, emotionally and so on. I live vicariously through them now. I wanted to write so much more for this thing, since there are so many other things that I observe through them that were very different for me. Maybe someday…

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