WMHB Chapter 2: A.K.A. Show & Tell

When I originally started reviewing this chapter it took me several days to recover.  I am nothing if not a masochistic book reader, hence the category.  So, here I come back to inflict some more agony upon myself, and to share it with those of you willing to read my own personal tripe.  I mean, lets be honest, I’m criticizing her for the horrid work she published, but when will I ever put my money where my mouth is?  Hold that thought!

This one was tough to get through.  I mean I’m starting to think that it may take me more than a week to finish the next one, with how hard this one was.  Just a warning, your entertainment may not come every week on schedule.  Guess you’ll just have to enjoy my writing prompts instead.

Alright, alright.  I know what you are really here for!  Onward to literary torture!!!

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Once More With Feeling Writing Prompts: Day 8

Yes, this is coming late. I’ve been running around all day with my family and haven’t had time to post.  I’m here now though!  See!  See!  I’m posting!  Okay, so what do we have here for our post on this fine Easter Sunday??? Well crap…

Can you think of a time when something that was poorly written caused confusion or trouble for you? Write about the experience. If you can’t think of anything, make something up!

Um…I have and hour and a half to write on this one? I may be in trouble!  Not that I don’t know how to write, nor that I really have to dive deep into my imagination to dredge up a moment when this could have applied to me, since anyone that’s been paying any attention would know what book/s this dredges up for me to rant.  The problem is, can I stop my rant in time to post it?

Let’s see if I can do it, shall we? Read more of this post

Once More With Feeling Writing Prompts: Day 5

I just realized that though I wrote this one by hand, I never actually got it onto wordpress.  Well here I go, posting it quick to keep myself from defaulting on my own word.  Once more with feeling prompts day five is: Begin with “Today I will…” and write for ten minutes. Read more of this post

WMHB Chapter 1: AKA Incompetent Scientist is Incompetent

So, I’ve come back to continue this book.  Do I dare remind everyone the last time I tried to read this, I’d gotten a migraine?  This time I’m fighting with neck pain, but that’s not related to this book.  It may make me a little more snarky though.  Now I know I said “Tune in next week” or some cheesy line to that effect, but I don’t know if I can, in fact get through a whole chapter in one week.  Sure, I can read it like Speedy Gonzales on crack but when it comes to writing a commentary, there are going to be chapters where it will seem like every single sentence is something to scoff at.  Don’t believe me? Wait till chapter 2…trust me!  So if I don’t update this every week, you’ll know why.

I would like to point out that this is not, in fact the worst thing I’ve read.  It’s damn close though!  Anyway, I know what you really want is to find out how we go from modern day to Tombstone, Arizona.  Patience, we’ll get there sooner than you can say “drunk scientist”!

…I realize there are a few smart asses out there that just said “drunk scientist” to prove that statement wrong.  To you fine people, I have but one reply…

😛

ON TO CHAPTER ONE!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

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WMHB Prologue: A.K.A. Trapped Inside Main Character’s Head…Help!

I was inspired by blogger Jenny Trout who reviewed the 50 Shades Novels.  She posted reviews of each individual chapter with loving snark that brought me to tears with laughter.  It couldn’t have been easy.  I’ve given myself migraines trying to read a really bad book, so I commend her for sticking to the project even when it was obviously painful to do.  She took something utterly horrid, and made something beautiful with it!  It’s because of her that I’m writing this now.  Remember that book that gave me a migraine?  Well I’m giving it to you.  Not all of it, but a general feel for what happens and my personal two-cents on them.  It’s somewhat in the same style as Jenny, with a few quotes and passages from the book itself.  Anything in red italics is a direct quote from the book and is not my own wording.  As a side note the book is only ever going to be referred to as WMHB, (link to a little synopsis of said book there) and the only names I’m going to use are the ones for the historical characters, as everyone else could be called anything under the sun and it wouldn’t change a damn thing.

Why am I doing this?  I just can’t stop myself.  The premise was so promising, and it got ruined so terribly by the author’s own vanity.  If they had just edited, and proofread and edited some more then maybe it would have been enjoyable and I could gladly give them kudos for a job well done.  But I can’t.  I could say congrats on finishing a story, but then I’d feel like I was giving them a participation trophy.  Honestly, there really should have been someone to point out that it needed quite a bit of polish before going out.  Really, they should have.

But all that aside, I also wanted to do this to see if there was a way to salvage it.  I wanted to see if, chapter by chapter, there was any saving it in the first place.  I mean, I can say that with editing it could have been good, but just how much editing would have had to happen?  Would the story even be recognizable in the end?  I post the question to you as I sort of pick it apart here.  What do you think? Will you join me on this journey into literary torture? If you’re still here, I have my answer.  Onward!

Also, in an effort of full disclosure, I was given a free copy by a friend, for an honest review.  Also, to show that I’m not just picking and choosing sentences that have problems, I provide the first paragraph of each chapter to you for free. You’re welcome. Read more of this post

Divinity Games: Shirt-bound

Not exactly sure what chapter this is yet, but it must be made digital, because I’m not going to loose this scene.  I’ve been sitting with this in my Drafts for forever and decided I needed to air it out.  I’m even going to take the password off of it for a little while *gasp!*.  Warning, it does have some sexual themes in it that are not appropriate for anyone under the age of eighteen (or whatever age is appropriate for those things. Use your good judgment.) If you are offended by those types of things, I would suggest you not read this.  You have been warned. Read more of this post

Two Months of Writing Prompts: Day Seventeen

Well, I just realized that in my notebook I skipped Seventeen entirely! Interesting how that works, huh? In the words of my brother “Silly Sea Serpent!” Well, here you go, the seventeenth prompt fresh and ready for all yall!  I’m trying to limit my non-story writing, so this isn’t nearly as long as I could, but who knows, it could be a decent begining.

“The cat’s out of the bag” is an idiom that indicates that a secret has been revealed. Write a story or poem that illustrates this idiom. Read more of this post

Two Months of Writing Prompts: Day Fifteen

Now, I don’t normally do this, but sometimes a writing prompt just fits with something I’m working on in story.  This is one of those cases, so you get a little bit of a sneak peak *rough and unedited* into Vertigo because today’s prompt is: I found the strangest thing in my pocket.  Since there’s nothing more to this prompt, I let it take me somewhere.  Enjoy! Read more of this post

There Was a Storm in My Brain!

Today has been a productive day! I wanted to write more in the story that’s been occupying me, but then my brain went on a tangent instead, and I started coming up with different story ideas that may or may not be short stories, but either way could be made into books.  Then after three story ideas I thought, what about a flower themed book series.  I remember reading a series of books once that had flowers on the covers.  I couldn’t tell you what the significance of the flowers were to the stories, nor can I really remember the author, but I liked the idea of the flowers for the covers.  Then I remembered that there are flower names that double as baby names.  So I started compiling a list of names that worked that way, and chose seven, then things snowballed from there until my three story ideas were absorbed by the series!  It’s going to be a romance series, and I’m okay with that.  In fact, I’m ready to own my love of Romance.  So, you are warned what this is going to be about, and if you still want to know more of what I’ve been up to, read on! Read more of this post

It’s A Sabotage

Haven’t posted in a bit.  Haven’t written in a bit.  I just can’t seem to get anything out when the opportunity presents itself.  It’s more than just that.  There’s actually a whole slew of reasons why my writing and bloging has gone on the wayside, and most are all my fault.  Procrastination is the name of the game, and being unproductive is the rule.  Slacker Cici has been in full tilt the past few months, but I swear, it hasn’t all been looking at memes and Facebook, though most of it has been my fault…all my fault! Read more of this post